Two Vampires, One War
by xFirery-Pixiex
Summary: Emmett and Alice are home alone and bored. What happens when they decided to play a game,that casues the the house to be destroyed, and how will the rest of the family react?


**Disclaimer: I own nothing everyone of these amazing characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. **

**AN: this is my first fanfic. Sorry if its not that good.**

**Two Vampires, One War**

What a boring day at the Cullen house. While Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Rosalie, and Jasper went hunting, Emmett and Alice sat at home under Edwards' orders. He wanted to make sure that if Bella needed anything that someone was there.

Once the clan left the two sat down to watch T.V. to help pass the time. After that seeing that nothing was on, Emmett asked "I'm bored. What do you want to do?"

Alice immediately jumps to her feet and screams "Shopping!"

"NO! How about a wrestling match?"

"Why so you can snap me in half?" She turns toward Emmett with eyebrows raised "You know Jasper won't like that very much. Will he?"

"Maybe not wrestling. Arm wrestling?" Alice shakes her head "Thumb war?"

"Umm… No."

"Aw. Come on, Alice." He whines. After a period of what looked like hard thinking Emmett finally says "Wait. I have an idea."

"Oh yeah, what's that?"

"Wait right here." Emmett goes running up the stairs, and seconds later, he comes back down with Edward's gold bed sheets and a canteen.

"You know those are Edward's, right?"

"Yeah, so."

"Why didn't you use yours?"

"Are you kidding. Rose would kill me."

"Fine, but if he asks, your telling him you took them."

"Whatever."

"Okay Emmett, so what's your big idea?"

"Alright, so, we put on this big scene, right, and we make it where you're a superhero and I'm a villain, and you're trying to kill me."

"And how do you propose we kill a vampire?"

"Acting. And we can run around, and knock things over, and cover me in blood." The last four words Emmett said with a little too much excitement

"That's your great idea?" Alice asked acidly "And what's your villain name going to be, Dr. Doofus?"

"Yeah, I thought that would be fun." Before he said indifferently "And my name will be Dr. McDreamy."

"Like that's any better."

"Yeah, well, at least it speaks the truth."

Under her breath Alice mutters. "Yeah maybe in retard land."

"What?" Emmett asks

"What?" Alice replies quickly.

"Did you say something?"

"No."

"Oh, I must be hearing things."

"Probably."

"You know what Alice-"

"Hey, why all the chit-chat, lets start. Um what are the sheets for?"

"Your cape."

"I get a cape?!" Alice asks excitedly.

"Oh, yeah."

"Okay lets put it on." After a few minutes of frustration they finally get it pinned around Alice's shoulders. Alice then does a little twirl, and asks "How does it look?"

"Um… gold?"

"you're an idiot."

"Okay, okay, it looks totally awesome."

"Good. But it's a little big."

"Oh you'll be okay."

"Okay." Alice says slowly. "okay so what do I do, just chase you around?" Still slightly confused with the whole thing.

"Yeah. Then after a while, you know as we progress." He makes a check-me-out-with-my-proper-language look and continues, "I'll eventually let you catch me. Because I want to make it look like I'm dying."

"Why?"

"Cause it'd look cool." Stating the obvious.

"Okay, so run."

"Alright. You'll never catch me alive, Gold woman."

"Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. Gold woman? You couldn't think of anything better?"

"Well you were wearing gold, and you're a girl, so it kind of went."

"Okay." Alice takes a step toward Emmett and a shill noise comes out of his mouth.

Within two hours, Alice and Emmett had the house completely destroyed. The walls had bloody handprints, and smears, glass was broken on the floor, and things were knocked over. It looked like something straight out of a horror movie.

After Emmett and Alice's big "fight scene" the two ended up in the kitchen, with Emmett sprawled across the floor, covered in blood, begging Alice for mercy.

At that very moment the rest of the family was walking through the front door and into the living room. Once they got inside Edward heard Alice thinking "_I'm going to kill you Emmett." _But it was usual for Emmett to upset someone in the house, and when he does usually what to kill him or hurt him. So Edward thinks nothing of it and shrugs.

"Oh my god, look at my house!" Esme says shocked by what she sees.

"Where's Alice?" Jasper asked worriedly.

"Um… Emmett?" Rosalie calls out quietly fearing something happened to him.

"Well, at least we know it's not Bella." Edward says happily. While Jasper and Rose turn to glare at him.

"Oh my god, my house!" Esme shrieks again.

While all Carlisle can do is stand there in shocked at what has happened.

Meanwhile back in the kitchen, Alice stands ups from her crouching position and says in the deepest voice she can "I am Gold Women hear me roar." She puts her hands and makes claws "meow." She grabs the knife and starts to go after Emmett.

Before she gets down to his level, he sits up and says "That was not a roar. Give m something better. Make me shake in my boots." He flashes her a quick smile, and clicks his tongue against his teeth, and lays back down on the floor.

"Um… Okay." Alice pauses, takes in a deep breath and says "I am Gold Woman hear me roar." She takes in another deep breath, and from deep within her chest, she lets out the most menacing growl she has ever done. That echoed through the entire house.

Without Emmett or Alice noticing the rest of the family runs through the kitchen door, just to find Alice pretending to stab Emmett. Alice tips her head back closes her eyes and lets out an evil laugh.

Once she puts her eyes back on Emmett, Carlisle clears his throat in order to let them know that they are no longer alone. Alice freezes, knife in hand. "Crap." she whispers under her breath. Slowly she turns around toward the kitchen door. Once she sees the entire family standing there, she pops up and says "Hey guys, so what's going on?" And puts a smile on, that's too big for her face.

After a few seconds of silence Edward asks "Why are you smiling so big?"

She throws both her arms out and says "I just missed you guys, that's all." She then noticed everyone was staring at her right hand. When she looked she realized she was still holding the knife, and quickly puts her hand behind her back.

Carlisle asks "What was that?"

"What was what?" She responds quickly.

"What?" Carlisle asks clearly confused

"Oh Emmett déjà vu." Emmett then starts to laugh quietly from the floor causing his whole body to shake.

Esme looks at Emmett and calmly says "Emmett." He freezes. After a few seconds she calls his name again. When he doesn't move, she looks at Rosalie "Rosie, help me out here, dear."

"Rosalie looks at Emmett and screams his name, and just like that he was up and standing in front of her.

"Yeah, baby." Being too scared to say anything else at that point.

"What were you doing in here?" Her voice was frighteningly calm.

"Playing Superheroes and villains." he turns toward Jasper "Dude what's wrong with your face you look all confused?" Before Jasper could say anything in response. Rosalie gave Emmett a look that spoke for itself, and he immediately stopped doing whatever he was doing and stood there in silence.

"Um.. Alice," Carlisle asks "Where did the blood come from?"

Alice shrugs her tiny shoulders "I don't know?"

Carlisle visibly stiffens "What do you mean you don't know. You two better have not be killing and dragging animals back to our house." He spoke sternly.

"No. Emmett was the one who brought the blood downstairs in a canteen."

"Carlisle looks at Emmett, and Emmett looked uncomfortable, which was new for Emmett, since he's usually the one making everyone else uncomfortable. "So Emmett," Carlisle starts, "Blood in a canteen. Where did you get it?"

"Well, sometimes when it's been a while since we last hunted, and I start to get really hungry, so I keep it as, lets say a midnight snack." Emmett then puts on his best, puppy dog pout.

Everyone stares at Emmett with a mixture of shock and disgust on there faces because what he had just told them was seriously weird. After a few minutes of everyone staring a him Carlisle finally says, "Well you two need to begin cleaning up this mess. Get to it."

The Jasper, Edward, Rosalie, and Carlisle leave the kitchen toward the living room. Esme turns toward Emmett and Alice "You may not do anything else until you're done cleaning. Got it." They both silently nod their heads yes.

"Well I guess we might as well get started." Alice reluctantly says. Emmett sighs and begins cleaning. Esme leaves the room with a simple "Thank You."

While they are cleaning up, the rest of the family is deciding on what punishments for them to endure.

"Alright, everyone. What should Alice's punishment be?" Carlisle asks, being open for suggestions.

And everyone at once at the say time says, "No shopping."

"Perfect, she'll be miserable without the mall and her credit cards." Edward states. "Now for Emmett." He smiles evilly.

"Oh he'll be easy to punish. We will all just think of random punishments for him to do." Rosalie replies. Already having her punishment for him in mind. "Lets go tell them."

"Alright, Lets go." Carlisle says.

By the time the family was done deciding on their punishments, the kitchen was almost clean. When they opened the door, Alice and Emmett were just finishing wiping the blood off the walls. "Hey Alice, how come you didn't see this coming?" Emmett asked.

"I don't know" She shrugs "I never seem to get visions when I'm about to get in trouble."

"okay you two." Carlisle starts "We have decided on your punishments."

"Oh Yeah?" Emmett says sarcastically.

"Yeah." Edward replies

"Okay, Alice first." Esme says. "No Shopping."

"W-what?" Alice replies in a small voice, looking like she was about to cry if she could.

"You heard me."

"But… But…but why?"

"Because it's something you love, sweetheart." Jasper was starting to feel a little sorry for his wife.

Alice looked shocked knowing that he had something to do with this. "Jasper you're suppose to be on my side."

"Well I am, most of the time. It's just today you went along with Emmett's game, and that puts you on his side. And I'm never on his side."

"Hey!" Emmett being offended that Jasper would never take his side.

"Alright guys. Enough." Carlisle ending the argument before it becomes worse. "It's Emmett's turn.

"Oh Boy."

"Yeah, Oh Boy, is right my punishment is no videos games."

He shrugs "Okay I can live with that."

"Oh, me next." Edward says. "Okay, no picking on Bella."

"Fine, steal all the fun." he huffed.

"My turn" States Jasper. "You have to read four books on the civil war."

"What?!"

"Yep. Out loud, and at human pace. To me so I know your reading them."

"Uh, yawn, boring." Emmett was really getting annoyed by all this. At the rate this was going he wasn't going to be allowed to do anything.

"Alright, Emmett," Rosalie says. "Last, but totally the worst."

"Oh, no. What are you going to do, Rose?"

"Emmett… No sex."

"WHAT?? That's not fair! For how long?!"

"One month." Rosalie then sit in a chair and begins filing her nails

"What?!"

"Yep. Sorry, babe. But I was worried when I first walked in the house, but then I found out you were just playing around. So I had to take something from you. One month isn't that long." She replies not looking up from her nails.

"What about you Esme. What's yours?" Emmett asks clearly upset.

"What? Oh, that cleaning." She says calmly.

"Hey, why does Alice only get two punishments while I get five?"

"Well," Edward says "You were the genesis that came up with the idea."

"How do you know that it was me? It could have been Alice."

"Um… Lets think about this for a moment. Uh, how about this, I can read your thoughts idiot."

"I hate you." Emmett says

"Oh yeah," Edward replies "Bite me!"

**_The End _**

**_I know it was probably stupid, but it was just something me and my friend came up with. Please review!_**


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